Wednesday, March 11. 

The second morning in a row that I am not getting my kids out of bed and giving them breakfast. Egh.  I hate this…

I arrive at the Imaging office Mercy at 6:45am and I am the youngest person by 40 years. Ok. maybe 30. 

The plan was for Scott to meet me for the appt. after Steve and Rose got to the house to watch the kids, but once I was there, I soon realized it was silly for him to come, just to wait with me.  He wasn’t allowed in the room during the scan and we wouldn’t have any results. So, I told him to just go to work and I would call him after it was all over.  I was also hoping to get over to see my friend Kristi and her new baby boy.  I was just next door from Mercy Hospital , but soon realized the appt would take longer than expected.  

Longer then expected because I made them take a blood pregnancy test.  I didn’t think I was pregnant, but I hadn’t started my period and they said that a CT scan to a first trimester child would be, well, not good. Funny how you love your kids even before you know they exist. So, that delayed things an hour, but after a negative test came back, it was time for the scan.

Overall, morning was awful. I was still going to the bathroom from the colonoscopy prep, the nurse blew my vain when giving me my IV for the CT scan, and the place just was not a fun place. And I haven’t had any coffee, forthe  second morning in a row. 

They brought me into the room for the scan, and laying on the scan, the woman asked me to describe my faith. To which I described as “strong” and she looked into my eyes and grabbed my hands and said she would pray for me. She left the room and the machine would do the rest of the talking. 

It was in that moment that I knew, no matter how much support I would have in this journey, I would always be completely alone in the physical sense to fight the battles ahead. 

And that is where faith steps in.

 Nikki Commentary: when Jeffrey can’t fall asleep at night, he recites “twinkle twinkle little star”.  That is what I find myself reciting in times of need. 

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